Torn between confusion and doubt
September 27, 2011
What a frustrating and stressful work week.
I shot my mouth off a couple of times this week regarding the leadership that we have been provided with at work. I might have taken a higher ranking member of management by surprise with my comments, but it needed to be said. I was promised a chance to elaborate on the situations before the end of the day, but that certainly didn’t happen.
The new hiring policy that would give me a chance to get the hell out of California is actually taking effect on Saturday as opposed to sometime in the next calendar year. It certainly caught me unawares as I thought I’d have a little longer to prepare my wishlist of cities that I would like to transfer to. I have no idea to when they’re going to start moving people around but if I do apply for a transfer, I know that I have to be ready to move when it’s time.
I’ve discussed some of this with J, not really in depth, but I will not be putting in for a transfer to Phoenix. When we were both there a few years ago we were not impressed with the area one bit. The only possibility that we’ve come up with so far is Reno, NV. We’re taking a look at Portland, OR and maybe Salt Lake City, UT. Las Vegas, NV is out of the question.
The original plan that we had built together was that we would move after J’s parents passed away. When I put in my wishlist, I may get a call right away or I may not get a call for a year or maybe no call at all. I have to admit that I’ve got a little bit of anxiety thinking about how I may have to move by myself and get things started on my own in a strange place. Factor in that it may take J a couple of years to join me. Or never.
The alternative is to not take the opportunity and just hope that somewhere down the road I can get the hell out of here, whenever that will be.
Update: J is running crime statistics and property values for all the ports that we’ve considered so far. I just told him, “You know what? We’ll just stay here and rent for the rest of our lives.” FTW.
It’s quite possible that taking a deep breath, put it out of your mind for a day or two and then assessing what your personal needs seem to be on three levels, Sarah’s….. John’s ….. and S/J’s might broaden or narrow the issues in a way that will allow you to view the issues with some clarity. Right now, your intensity over the day to day happenings at the job are clouding your prose, and probably your thinking. It sounds as if you are starting to slip into the pit where you’re living the job instead of doing the job so that you can live. You’re dad, who is Oh So together, is advocating channeling Peace and Tranquility so that you can establish perspective. Go figure.
Thanks Dad, I’m trying to do that.
My personal opinion? Portland, OR kicks ass! I think you’d love it there.
Peace and tranquility, I have not in my job. So its time to get out of it. If only I could find another job. I think Dad is right this time. Think about what S, J, and S/J need and go for it. I think Portland would be a good place. Definitely not NV with the water shortages and the oppressive heat. Not AZ because it is AZ. J would have to walk around with his citizenship papers all the time. I don’t think he’d like that very much.